Září 2012

Bussiness trip to WolfCastle

10. září 2012 v 22:09 | MarT
Tak sem si zas po čase řek, že kdejakej Řek by ocenil opětovný rozříření pohledu na svět našeho blogu, míněno víc než jednim okem (pač metalfan si prej nedávno lokl pajcovanýho metanolu a teď chodí po své rodné vsi s vizáží kapitána Hooka). Tak si držte prdele!
Protože sme ale jak už víte up-to-date blog, budu míchat jazyky jak se mi zrovna bude hodit, a pač už anglicky skoro neumim, tak sorry for my english, I am only from Czech:-D
Inu, o co sem se s vámi chtěl podělit, kromě toho že Vlasta ztratil po vlasech i poslední kousek svý svobody, byl muj supr trupr bussiness trip to Germany. Tímto se omlouvám englicky nespíkujícím čtenářům (kein stress, přicházíte vo hovno, v životě sou horší věci, třeba když dojde Máše tsikoudie, nebo když HeavyMetalFan zapomene svůj proud vědomí.-D)

So I decided to travel a bit(ch), that's why I went to Germany. Actually, my employer had decided for me:-D Aber kein stress, let's go to Wolfsburg! Based on the knowledge of the name, I packed up first of all my Anti-wolf cream (if you do not knot, what it is or what it is good for, you are either unknown Anna or shoot yourself dead). So i went there by trains, it took only 9 hours and for the fucking price you do not get anything (not a beer, nor sandwich on germanboard, nor Eintopf, so do not complain on airlines Mr. HeavymetalfanJ). When I got off, it was the last time for the following 10 days when I saw something else than Volkswagen (the train was still there, fortunately VW do not make trains). For you who do not know about VW, it is a little shithole company which tries to make some cars of poor quality and it is just a misunderstanding that they own Skoda).
So then I was taken to a VW powerplant over there (they are so much jantars (see HeavyMetalFan's blog for explanation) that they do not know what to produce: car or electricity…finaly it's quite similar, isn't that?). First of all, I had to write down all screwdrivers, their product numbers and other tools which I was carrying to a special big paper and i had to do some nasty promises so that I could be let go in the fucking area. Then we went to see the powerplant. I have seen some big things in my life, like big hunger, big weight in gym, big thirst of unknown blogwriter Tomas, big scream of flying cat, big pasta after gym, Tom'sbig pasta with gyros without gyros, big hangover of Jeorge…but not such a big shithouse. I wanted to take a pic of this big shit, but it was so big that it did not fit into my camera and bytheway it was forbidden.
After work I was taken to my first class apartment. It was a great room with 2 beds and shitting accessories (toilet and bath). The room had to be really huge, before someone decided to leave out the following higher floor and make the roof fucking low, going through this jantar's room. So I was walking there like a monkey with head rolled left or right depending on the direction I went along the room because it was fucking cut half by this roof! On the other hand, what would you expect for 50euro per night accomodation (it is only a price for 40 luxury-tapped Pilsner beersJ). To enlarge the comfort, german owner decided to instal really comfy beds...they were even so comfy that when I sat there I sunk down by half a meter. So after the first night when i woke up broken&angry&fuckedup&inmotherfuckingmood I put down the shitty matress on the ground every day so that it was little less fucking soft and wannabe-comfy. That time I started stealing packed marmelades from the kitchen table to improve my mood.
BTW, have you heard the new about Vlasta? Yes, this in-past-long - haired - guy…I was told by an unknown and reliable source that the poor fellow got trully mad…
So I worked there in the big shitplant and I wasn't taking pictures because I do not have a webcam on my ntb which was checked at the reception (by a super-pleasant Gertrude (german name or Czech designation for a pretty german girl)), nor a camera on my phone (only a small one) and my Panasonic 12MPix camera does not countJ So if you wanna see a czech engineer inside a 130MW boiler, a czech engineer beside dismantled turbine, a czech engineer breaking up a sensor on some fucking RauchgasEntschwindlungensEtwas Tank, do not ask me, because I do not have them…
Once we went for a dinner&beer to a pub. The waitress was a super-hot Gertrude described as 76,135,100 (age; weight; power of the motor of the crane that could lift her [kW]). The meal i cannot evaluate, cause I had shared some stuff on the hotel so i was not hungry in the pub (thank you, Felix, for teaching us that.-)). So I ordered a beer.
I was given a bucket (the thing you put water in for cleaning a home-floor). Probably i arrived to some big-things-region (Ein Grosse-Sache-Region),I thought. Except for my room, also. It was called Paulaner, a special edition, probably cause the temperature of that was sufficient for making first class english tee. So I went home to sleep on my matressJ
That time I started to share even musli from the next-to-kitchen-room to cheer myself up.
When my time got over, I went to to see my friend in the VW reception to say her goodbye, packed my scrap including the shared things and we jumped into Peugeot (only one in that region) to go home by car. I was really excited cause I knew that german first class highways are speed-unlimited. So I fit myself behind the steering wheel and put a brick on the gas pedal. After a while I moved it onto the brake pedal cause all the super-hard-working-german-guys are in the middle of their ways to the seaside on Friday at 3pm. So my excitement lowered a little bit during the next 200km when we rode alternately 80, 100, 80, 40, 60, 20, 0, 5, 0, 20, 0, 60 kms per hour on the fucking shitway! On the other hand, we could enjoy the few hundred thousends of wind-mill-like powerplants which we passed (probably the sensor which someone broke up in VW plant stopped it so they had to quickly make some new plants to handle the problemJ).

So I am still alive, and now the main thing i wanted to tell you about. Vlasta, but actually I do not follow gossips, but Vlasta, someone from Prague has told me, has become an underpantoffelman!
He was forced to move to a flat of an unknown Monika-girl and he obeyed. Sad story, I know.
Good bye, old Vlasta L